commentary by Patrick H. Moore
Life = Challenge after Challenge after Challenge. I suppose that without challenges we wouldn’t have the gumption to even wake up in the morning. Two of the toughest challenges that parents sometimes face are 1) maintaining proper (and stable) focus on the children if the marriage breaks up; and 2) caring properly (and lovingly) for a handicapped child whether or not the marriage is intact.
Therefore, we can assume that the penultimate challenge for a mother may be continuing to provide adequate and selfless care to a handicapped child when you have recently split up with your husband of many years and suddenly find yourself up to your ears in a relationship with a new boyfriend.
The obvious question becomes: Can you put your own desires for love and intimacy with your new boyfriend aside sufficiently to continue to give your handicapped child the care he or she needs. And here’s where it can get really rocky: Suppose your new boyfriend resents the presence of your handicapped child who obviously requires a great deal of extra care?
I bring this up (without jumping to any conclusions) because of a new heart-rending case out of Vermont where a mother, Melissa Robitille (a noveliest and book editor) and her new boyfriend, Walter Richters III (I don’t know what Walter does), are charged with second degree murder for allegedly poisoning Melissa’s 13-year-old handicapped son by placing a lethal dose of alcohol in his IV, which he required for daily fluids and medications.
Let us read an entry from Melissa’s blog about her handicapped son from a year or so ago. At the time this was written, Melissa was still married to her former 64 year old husband:
‘Little Man’ is my son Isaac Robitille. He’s 12 and he has holoprosencephaly – an anomaly in which the fetal horseshoe-shaped brain doesn’t fully divide into two hemispheres. The doctors said he wouldn’t live to be six months old. He’s got a bunch of other differences, but he’s a delightfully happy little boy, loves math, hugs, kisses, and his dog (her name is Tickle – he named her!), and hates physical therapy. He speaks mostly tactile ASL. He was medically fragile for a long time after he was born, so writing took a back burner for me, but I can’t say that I regret it since I adore him and my skills as a writer have improved by leaps and bounds since 1999.
Based on Melissa’s blog entry, this last thing on earth we would expect is the news that she and her new boyfriend slipped alcohol into Little Man’s IV, allegedly to kill him. Yet, according to law enforcement, that’s exactly what happened.
Meg Wagner of the New York Daily News writes:
A Vermont mom and her boyfriend killed her disabled son by dumping a deadly dose of alcohol in his IV tube, police said.
Melissa Robitille and Walter Richters III were charged with second-degree murder Tuesday for 13-year-old Isaac Robitille’s August death, WCAX reported.
Police believe the two poisoned an IV normally used for fluids and medications with liquor — when he died, his blood-alcohol content was .146, nearly twice the legal limit, police said.
Of note is the possibility that Isaac condition worsened between the age of 12, when Melissa wrote her blog entry, and 13 when he met his fate. It’s not clear to me at what age he first required a feeding tube and intravenous tubes to stay alive.
In any event, on Aug, 22, Melissa called 911 to report she found Isaac dead and the toxicology report later revealed his blood’s high alcohol content.
Both Melissa and her boyfriend are in police custody in Hardwick, awaiting arraignment.
An article by Melissa Howell of WCAX News states that neighbors report that “they rarely saw the special needs child outside prior to his death.”
“I haven’t seen him for quite a while,” says Barbara Larabee, who lives next door. “Knowing he had all that to deal with and then parents that would do that, it’s just heartbreaking.”
Another next door neighbor, Elijah Morgan, says, “Family and stuff would help him in his wheelchair and stuff, walking around…I was outside playing basketball and I hear the ambulance going by.”
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First, I am a bit surprised that Melissa and Richters are only being charged with second-degree-murder, though I suppose putting alcohol in Isaac’s IV could have been a spur-of-the-moment decision in a fit of passion, pique or frustration.
Second, how are we to explain Melissa’s dreadful decision, notwithstanding whatever influence Richters may or may not have had on her? She had clearly sacrificed immensely for a very long time to maintain the best quality of life possible for her son, and based on her earlier statements, she loved him dearly.
But the parents of severely handicapped children sometimes reach a breaking point and suddenly engage in seemingly irrational behavior that is completely antithetical to their many years of self-sacrifice. This would appear to be what happened to Kelli Stapleton who has just been sentenced to 10 to 22 years for her attempt to end her daughter Isabelle’s life. Ms. Stapleton was allowed to plead to first-degree-child abuse in order to avoid the specter of a life sentence. At present, it is unknown if the Vermont prosecutors would be willing to contemplate a similar resolution in the case of Isaac.