by Patrick H. Moore
You are Jaime X and you were quite young when you entered into a coercive sexual relationship with a female teacher at Chemawa Middle School in Riverside, CA. At first — prior to the sexuality — you may have been pleased that your teacher was paying attention to you. But then when that consideration segued into unwanted sexual advances you were unable to protect yourself. If you had been braver, you would have either said “no” to your assailant in no uncertain terms or, if that didn’t work, you would have told your mother or your dad or a friend or maybe a different teacher. You would have reached out for help and hopefully someone would have stood tall and done the right thing.
Because I was not there, I don’t know for sure if anyone would have helped you if you had reached out. Children are at a huge disadvantage in situations like this where they are being sexually victimized by an adult authority figure. And perhaps you did reach out? Or perhaps you kept it all inside and suffered a thousand daily deaths as the wrongness of what was being done to you ate at your soul.
What we do know, based on what you’ve told us by means of your YouTube posting, is that the molestation went on for a long time – apparently many years. We know that your victimizer brainwashed you and manipulated you and convinced you, at that time, that you wanted to have a sexual relationship with a full-grown woman even though you were only a middle-school child. And we know that it hurt you — a great deal.
Maybe you eventually sought help from a counselor or therapist. Maybe you’ve been in therapy for years. Or maybe you found a trusted friend who you confided in and who was supportive.
At some point, something clicked inside you and you decided that you were going to track down your tormenter and confront her. And you decided that through YouTube, you were going to tell the world.
* * * * *
In watching your video, I am struck by several things. I am struck by how scared you were. You state at one point that you are “shaking like a leaf”. But your fear didn’t stop you from confronting Ms. _______, who by this point had worked her way up to being an Assistant Principal Alhambra High School in Alhambra, CA.
What was quite amazing is the fact that you got through to your tormenter in the first place. You had to make your way through a battery of receptionists, but it was almost like it was fated that on that particular day you were going to get through to Ms. _______ and she was going to stay on the line and speak to you. That, perhaps, is remarkable in itself.
When you got Ms. _______ on the line, you patiently verified that she was, indeed, the same woman who had taught at Chemawa Middle School in Riverside and had coerced you into entering into a sexual relationship with her when you were only 12 years old.
In your call, you ask Ms. _______, your former teacher if she knows that what she did was wrong.
She states: “Yes, and I regret it.”
Like any good lawyer, you ask a leading question that would probably not be overturned in a court of law: “You’re an assistant principal, huh?”
Ms. _______ answers, “Yes.”
“So what happens when a student comes in and says they’re having a sexual relationship with a teacher?,” you ask Ms. _______.
“Then I would involve law enforcement,” says the woman who has essentially admitted to being your abuser.
“So how is that any different from what you did when I was at Chemawa Middle?,” you ask, with just a hint of the dramatic.
After a very long paused, the woman who has admitted to being Ms. _______ says, “It’s not.”
After a few more exchanges, you appear to realize that you are not getting anywhere. You tell Ms. ______ that she is “disgusting” and hang up.
Afterwards, you look into the camera and tell the world, “And I’m shaking like a leaf … not even an ‘I’m sorry.’ Or anything. Just that she regrets it.”
* * * * *
Jaime X was frustrated when she discovered that the statute of limitations had run and that Ms. _______ could not be criminally prosecuted for her crime. Due to her bringing this matter before the public by means of social media, however, the Alhambra Unified School District authorities could not “stick their head in the sand.” In fact, they sent a statement to Brittany Hopper of KCAL9 which read in part:
“Alhambra high school administration received an electronic message with a YouTube link incriminating an Alhambra high school administrator. Alhambra high school administration contacted the Alhambra Police Department immediately upon discovering the link. She is no longer an employee of Alhambra High School or the Alhambra Unified School District.”
What this means is that although charges will not be brought against Ms. _______ due to the statute of limitations, she will almost certainly never again work with children in the public sector.
Jaime X has done a very brave thing and in so doing, she has stood up for every helpless victim of an older adult abuser. Although it certainly will not happen, every school kid in America should be required to watch Jaime X’s video. Kids need to know that, at least in many cases, the authorities will take the proper steps if it is discovered that an adult authority figure is abusing a child.
I hope, Jaime X, that through being brave and confronting Ms. _______, you have gained some small measure of peace and satisfaction. Perhaps your phone call will prove to be an important step in your healing process.
And at the very least, Ms. ______ will not be working with children any more. And that is certainly a good thing.