commentary by Patrick H. Moore
It really sucks being poor. Anyone who has been in that position will tell you the same. When I was a kid in junior high in Oakland, California (where “there is allegedly no there there” (a lie)), we were probably the poorest family living on the North Oakland hillside, a generally prosperous area. We were so freakin’ poor that for a year I wore truly wretched hand-me-downs and had to spread the peanut butter so thin that my close friend Johan would roll his eyes and laugh. He was a saint, however, and never spread the word around so no one else knew. By the time I was 13, I had several paper routes and was buying my own clothes and bicycles and keeping my head above water.
That was 50 years ago and I’m no longer poor. But the fear is in me and the tentacles clutch deep into the fiber of my being; more than anything, I fear being poor and will keep working till I’m at least 70 or even older to bolster our nest-egg against an uncertain future. Why? Easy. This is America where it’s “dog eat dog and devil take the hindmost” and if you don’t got the “dolla bill, y’all”, you are basically f_____.
Because of my own trying experience during my formative years, I have great sympathy for any working adult who is doing their best to support themselves and their child/children. Why do I bring this up today? Easy. Because I’m more than a little pissed off over what has happened to Debra Harrell, a hard-working mom in North Augusta, South Carolina, who is currently cooling her heels in county lock-up because she had the audacity to let her daughter play in a public park while she was at working at McDonald’s, presumably for the minimum wage or not much more than minimum wage, in a courageous attempt to pay rent for her and her daughter and keep food on the table and basically give her child a decent life.
So if I’m not my usual laid-back, not overly histrionic, self in this post, I make no apologies. I believe this story, which has now been picked up by various progressive and/or liberal media sites including The Atlantic, The Nation and Salon, was originally broken by Lenore Slenazy of the Hit-and-Run Blog.
Ms. Skenazy writes:
Just in case you thought you could parent whatever way you see fit in 2014 America:
A North Augusta mother is in jail after witnesses say she left her nine-year-old daughter at a nearby park, for hours at a time.
Hours at a time? At a park? In the summer? Gosh! That certainly sounds normal and fun like a reason to throw a mom in jail—and place the child in state custody.
Here are the facts: Debra Harrell works at McDonald’s in North Augusta, South Carolina. For most of the summer, her daughter had stayed there with her, playing on a laptop that Harrell had scrounged up the money to purchase. (McDonald’s has free WiFi.) Sadly, the Harrell home was robbed and the laptop stolen, so the girl asked her mother if she could be dropped off at the park to play instead.
Harrell said yes. She gave her daughter a cell phone. The girl went to the park—a place so popular that at any given time there are about 40 kids frolicking—two days in a row. There were swings, a “splash pad,” and shade. On her third day at the park, an adult asked the girl where her mother was. At work, the daughter replied.
The shocked adult called the cops. Authorities declared the girl “abandoned” and proceeded to arrest the mother.
Ms. Skenazy goes on to write that if you watch the news, “it sounds like Debra Harrell committed a serious, unconscionable crime.” The officious, holier-than-thou reporter, with the good job and the slick clothes, “looks ready to burst with contempt” and righteous indignation.
Well, what the freak was Mom supposed to do? Make her daughter sit there at McDonald’s throughout her shift twiddling her thumbs, wasting her time, doing next to nothing when she could be playing outside with the other children in the park in the fresh air enjoying the “splash pad”?
Apparently, that’s exactly what she was supposed to do according to the Department of Social Services who has taken Ms. Harrell’s child into custody, while law enforcement has arrested Mom and bucketed her.
And remember, the child had a cell phone and could call Mom to check in at any time. Furthermore, the park was within easy walking distance. Was this plan entirely without risk? No, in theory an evil motha_____, and they do exist, could have come along and snatched the child. But how likely is that?
Ms. Skenazy asks: ‘In broad daylight? In a crowded park? Just because something happened on Law & Order doesn’t mean it’s happening all the time in real life. Make “what if?” thinking the basis for an arrest and the cops can collar anyone. “You let your son play in the front yard? What if a man drove up and kidnapped him?” “You let your daughter sleep in her own room? What if a man climbed through the window?” etc.’
As a society, we are so fearful that this kind of intense paranoia can almost seem real. But these are fears. For the most not THEY ARE NOT REALITY. According to The Christian Science Monitor, our crime rate today is back to what it was when gas was 29 cents a gallon. Although the popular perception is that our kids are in constant danger all of the time, this is simply not so. Our kids are probably as safe or safer than we were back in the day BEFORE FEAR CAME and our parents let us enjoy summer outside, on our own, without any fear that they would be arrested for letting us kids be children.
Ms. Skenazy concludes:
“But because some busybody thought she knew more about this girl’s safety than the girl’s own mother, a family has been separated. Harrell is in jail and the child is in the custody of the Department of Social Services. If only the girl had spent her whole summer sitting in McDonald’s—surfing the internet and eating a Big Mac instead of playing outside and getting fresh air—this never would have happened.”
* * * * *
So what should have happened? First of all, I don’t really see anything terribly wrong with the parent who questioned the child calling the authorities when she found out that Mom was at work. The problem is with how the authorities responded to the situation. They should have investigated slowly and carefully. They should have talked to Mom. Cool heads should have prevailed and some kind of rational solution should have been reached.
At worst, it should have been something like this:
“We’re sorry, Ms. Harrell, but for your daughter’s safety, we believe you better keep her there with you at McDonald’s while you are at work. In an abundance of caution, just to be on the safe side… Okay?”
But this is not what happened. Mom’s locked up in county and Daughter is totally traumatized in the custody of strangers and I’m totally pissed.
It sucks being poor. It really sucks.