commentary by Patrick H. Moore
The word “vicarious” is defined as experienced in the imagination through the feelings or actions of another person. Many if not most of us live vicariously to some degree, often through our children. When our favorite athletes come through in the clutch, we’re right there with them “making the big play” and reaping the bountiful laurels. One area where our vicarious “dream life” often manifests is in the area of sex and romance. Women enjoy fantasizing about “dreamboats” and no doubt insert themselves 
imaginatively in the place of the female leads playing opposite these “dreamy guys”. In recent decades, actors of moderate talent such as Hugh Grant have forged excellent careers by allowing themselves to be the vicarious object of desire of untold numbers of women.
And generally speaking, this is probably a good thing. Life would get pretty dull without engaging in vicarious fantasies now and then.
But what if your vicarious desires turns dark? What if you want to hurt the object of your vicarious desire? And what if you take affirmative steps to make your dark fantasy come true? Then things can get complicated. In fact, if you take it a step too far, you can wind up doing hard time because of your aggressive negative fantasies.
An interesting example of this comes to us out of Merrie Olde England where a twisted 30-year-old woman named Joanne Berry developed such hatred for another woman who reportedly “treated her with nothing but kindness” that she decided she could only be satisfied by having her enemy violently raped by a man of her (Joanne’s) choice.
The Guardian brings us this sordid but rather fascinating story which, oddly enough, is largely narrated not by the prosecutor, which is what we would expect in an American court of law, but rather by the judge.
A woman who used sex chatrooms to try to trick strangers into raping a former work colleague has been jailed for six years.
Joanne Berry, 30, posed as the woman online and invited men to act out violent rape fantasies and role play with her.
A judge said Berry may have held the victim responsible for losing her temporary job after Berry displayed “increasingly erratic behaviour” at work.
At some point, after Berry had disclosed her former co-worker’s address online, one eager wannabe “rapist” tried to bully his way in to the woman’s home to “act out” the “rape”. That is, he assumed he was going to have hot sex with her in the guise of rape. To his credit, however, Mr. Wannabe quickly realized that both he and the purported victim had been set up by a third party, who just happened to be the conniving Joanne Berry. Aware that things were not going according to plan, Mr. Wannabe gave up his bad acting job and flew the coop.
As a result of trying to have her “enemy” really raped by an unknown assailant, Berry, of Grove Park, south-east London, was convicted in May of putting a person in fear of violence. She was also convicted of committing an assault with the intention of committing a sexual offense, common assault and attempting to cause a person to engage in sexual activity without consent.
In breaking down the case, Judge David Griffith-Jones QC remarked that Berry had developed an “irrational vendetta” against the victim who had only shown kindness towards her.
The prosecutor told the court that the victim initially bore Berry’s “increasingly frenetic and bizarre” behavior, which took place in a job environment where Berry had a temporary work assignment, with “a degree of fortitude”.
But things deteriorated. The judge explained:
“Things got to a point where (the victim) felt the need to keep you at arm’s length, moreover because of your increasingly erratic behaviour.
“Your temporary work placement was terminated. It’s now quite clear that, irrationally, you took exception to being rebuffed by (the victim).
“It may be that you held her responsible for the loss of your temporary employment.”
Based on her anger, the aggrieved Berry resolved to exact some form of vicarious “revenge or retribution”.
The judge continues: “Thus, it was, you embarked on a bizarre series of events. You carried out some internet research and discovered a web-based chatline facility on which you would make contact with individuals with particular sexual and other interests.
“Through that facility, you made contact with a particular individual – ‘DH’ – who gave evidence during the trial.”
Berry contacted DH repeatedly over a period of time pretending that she enjoyed sex and engaging in role play. But that, of course, was not enough and she eventually persuaded DH to come to “her” home, knock on the door, enter and rape her.
Sayeth the judge: “During this you didn’t reveal your true identity and the address that you provided as your own was in fact (the victim’s) home address.
“He burst in intent on putting the plan between you and him into operation. Fortunately, he swiftly realised that something was amiss, so, after his initial aggressive entry, he aborted the plan.”
* * * * *
Good for DH. Had he not “aborted the plan”, he too would be sitting in the dock facing a serious term of incarceration in a British “nick”.
Meanwhile, let all your vicarious fantasies be positive ones…and you’ll do just fine.